


First (But Far From Last)

by LonelyThursday



Series: Newsies Reincarnated [1]
Category: Newsies - All Media Types, Newsies!: the Musical - Fierstein/Menken
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Crushes, F/M, Family, Friendship, Gen, High School, I swear it’s a lot more mild than the tags make it look, M/M, Modern Era, Period-Typical Homophobia, Reincarnation, Specs!centric, Trans Character, Trans Male Character, and very non graphically, i just want to cover my bases, in the past, in the past though, tw: death mentioned, tw: suicide mentioned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-02
Updated: 2019-11-02
Packaged: 2021-01-20 17:57:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,600
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21285812
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LonelyThursday/pseuds/LonelyThursday
Summary: Spencer is the first in the group to regain his memories, or at least he’s pretty sure he’s the first, and he’s pretty sure that they’re memories.They must be memories... right? Because one minute he’s watching Romeo and Sophia have a sword fight with spoons, and the next he’s remembering a different version of Sophia, wearing different clothes, having a different spoon fight with a different boy. And it’s not just Smalls, he remembers people he doesn’t even know. He can remember his parents, and growing up just outside of New York City, and going to school every day; but he also remembers being an orphan, and living in a lodging house in lower Manhattan, and selling newspapers all day just to afford a little bit of bread and a safe place to sleep.Maybe he's just going crazy, but still...
Relationships: Buttons/Henry/Jojo (Newsies), Minor or Background Relationship(s), Romeo/Specs (Newsies)
Series: Newsies Reincarnated [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1534421
Comments: 3
Kudos: 27





	First (But Far From Last)

**Author's Note:**

> Warnings for mentioned unhappy endings for people in their past lives. It's not graphic, but there's some murder, some suicide  
But nothing bad happens in the present

Spencer is the first in the group to regain his _memories,_ or at least he’s pretty sure he’s the first, and he’s pretty sure that they’re memories. 

They must be memories, right? Because one minute he’s watching Romeo and Sophia have a sword fight with spoons, and the next he’s _remembering _a _different_ version of Sophia (Smalls?), wearing _different_ clothes, having a _different_ spoon fight with a _different_ boy. And it’s not just Smalls, he can remember a _different_ version of Romeo, and of Buttons, and of Katherine. He _remembers_ people he doesn’t even _know,_ and _remembers_ being friends with people he’s _seen_ but never _talked_ to. He can remember his parents, and growing up just outside of New York City, and going to school every day; but he _also_ _remembers_ being an orphan, and living in a lodging house in lower Manhattan, and selling newspapers all day just to afford a little bit of bread and a safe place to sleep. 

It’s like the world’s weirdest case of déjà vu. Though maybe déjà vu isn’t the correct term… maybe it’s more like déjà vécu or presque vu? He’s not sure. All he’s sure of is that his head is suddenly killing him. 

“-cer? Spencer?” He hears someone calling. Katherine. Katherine’s the one calling, but who’s Spencer? Oh right. He’s Spencer. His name is Spencer and that’s what people call him. 

“Spencer?” That’s Romeo, he and Smalls ended their spoon fight in favor of making sure that their friend is alright. 

_“Fine!” _Specs - Spencer - gasps out, but he’s not, and his friends can tell. 

“Do you need to go to the nurse?” Buttons asks, gently laying a hand on his shoulder. She’s a girl this time, but Specs is certain that she’s the same Buttons, they even call her ‘Buttons’ in this life. They don’t call him ‘Specs’, and they don’t call Sophia ‘Smalls’, but Buttons is always ‘Buttons’. 

“My head hurts,” Specs admits. The lunch room is too loud, and the fluorescence lights too bright; those mixed with the tangle of new - old - memories in his head lead to a nearly debilitating migraine. 

Ever the leader, Katherine jumps into action. “Romeo, help me get Spence to the nurse, Sophia, Buttons, gather our stuff.”

Katherine pulls Specs up by one arm and once he’s standing, Romeo takes his place under his other arm. Neither Katherine, nor Romeo are that tall, Specs is easily half a foot taller than Katherine, and Romeo’s even shorter than her, so their journey to the nurse’s office is slow, and Specs can’t seem to get his legs to work properly, but they get there eventually. 

The nurse lets Specs sleep in a dark room until one of his moms can come pick him up. Katherine, Romeo, Smalls, and Buttons stay until lunch ends, but as soon as the bell rings, nurse Hannah is shooing them off to class. Hannah is _familiar_ too, but Specs’ head hurts too much for him to think too much about it. 

It takes about half an hour for Specs’ maman to come pick him up. He feels bad that she had to leave work early for him, but on the other hand, his head hurts way too much for him to just wait for school to end and Katherine to drive him home. 

“Tu vas bien, mon bébé?” His maman asks quietly so as to not make his migraine worse as she enters the dark room. 

“Ma tête me tue, maman,” Specs groans.

“Je sais, bébé. rentrons à la maison.” His maman careful helps him sit up, then she and nurse Hannah help him walk out to the car. They don’t talk the entire ride home, Specs tries to close his eyes and sleep, but the crushing weight of _memories_ prevents him from truly falling asleep. 

Once at home, Specs lies on the sofa in their living room while his maman closes all the blinds, making the room as dark as possible. He would go to his own room, but his window faces south and he wouldn’t be able to make his room as dark as the living room (which has north facing windows). His maman also makes him soup and brings him water, but his stomach churns at the thought of food, and water isn’t much better. 

Once she’s sure that he’s as comfortable as he can be, his maman leaves him alone in the living room. _Memories_ continue to play in Specs’ mind, and since he’s alone, he lets them. _A small apartment, an air of misery, a cold alley, an overcrowded prison, a friend, a rowdy bunk room, a new family, selling newspapers, a strike, a revolution, overwhelming joy, a dingy factory, another small apartment, a woman with a soft smile and sad eyes, a baby, a funeral, a war-_

It all circles around and around in Specs’ head, so much he can hardly make sense of it. He’s vaguely aware of his mom coming home, of her trying again to get him to eat, of both his moms helping him up the stairs and into his own bed, but it’s all hazy compared to the _memories. _

By morning, he’s managed to make sense of a lot of it. He’s not sure if he’d been sleeping that night, or if he’d just let the waves of _memories_ drown him, but either way, he’s got a better handle on it now. 

He is _currently _Spencer Travers, a sixteen-year-old high school student who lives in a small town just outside of NYC. He attends Roosevelt high with his friends Katherine Plumber, Romeo Larkin, Buttons Davenport, and Sophia Larkin, he takes ballet lessons at Sophia and Romeo’s mom’s studio with Joey de la Guerra, and Tom Maughn, and he takes fencing lessons in the city with Louis Ballatt. 

But his _past_ self would have called these people Katherine Pulitzer, Romeo, Buttons, Smalls, Jojo, Tommy Boy, and Kid Blink, and would have called himself - and answered to - the name Specs. His _past_ self wouldn’t be in school, or taking dance lessons, or fencing lessons. His _past_ self would be spending long hours on the streets trying to sell newspapers for a penny each. His _past_ self didn’t have a home, or even _one_ mom, let alone two. His _past_ self would be starving, would be beaten, would be fighting every minute of every day just to get _somewhere. _

His _past_ self would love to have the life he has now. And he does. Love the life that he has now.

Specs’ moms let him stay home from school another day, for which he is grateful. Yeah, he’d like to see his friends again (especially knowing what he knows now), but he’d also like more time to fully process everything before he interacts with other people, he doesn’t want anyone thinking he’s insane after all. This isn’t something that just happens every day, or at least it’s not something that anyone admits to. It must happen to other people… right?

He has to separate people he knew _then_ from people he knows _now, _so that he doesn’t say the wrong thing to the wrong person and freak them out. For instance: there’s Henrietta Peterson, whom Specs is almost _certain_ is Henry, she goes to his school, but he’s never talked to her before, so he shouldn’t act like they’re friends now, she doesn’t know him after all. He also shouldn’t get all friendly with Blink either; sure, he has fencing with Blink, but they’re not all that close, Blink is a pretty closed off kind of guy. That being said, as long as he doesn’t say it out loud, he can continue to refer to him as Blink in his head. 

Romeo and the others text him throughout the day, and by the time he goes to bed that night, he feels ready to go back to school, to see his friends, and to keep his newfound memories to himself. Not only that, but he’s ready to call it what it is: reincarnation. He’s been reincarnated from a poor newsboy at the turn of the twentieth century, to a middle class high schooler in the early twenty-first century. 

The next day, he goes to school. His friends hover a little, but after a little reassurance that he feels fine now, they leave him alone. It’s harder than he thought it’d be, acting like nothing’s happened, acting like he’s the same kid he was three days ago; but he’s _not_ the same anymore, he’s not _just_ Spencer Travers anymore, he’s Specs too. He has to force himself not to greet Henry when he sees her in the halls, he has to refrain from asking Buttons about her siblings (she has three, but in the _past_ he’d had seven), and every now and then he finds himself looking for Jack’s leadership, only to remember that he hasn’t met Jack, not here, not now. 

“Are you sure you’re alright?” Katherine asks quietly as their English teacher drones on about Shakespeare in a monotone. 

“I’m sure, Kath,” Specs answers with a smile, but Katherine just frowns. 

“You’ve never called me Kath before,” she observes. She’s right, in elementary school, she’d gone by Katie, and he still calls her that sometimes, but never Kath. Not in _this_ life. 

“I was just trying it out,” Specs says with a shrug, trying to pass it off nonchalantly. “I won’t call you that anymore if you don’t want me to.”

“No, it’s alright,” Katherine says with a smile. “I think I like it. It’s different, ya know?”

Specs nods, happy that he was able to play off his mistake so easily. Of course he was, she doesn’t know he has _past_ _memories_ in his head. To her, there was nothing significant about the nickname other than it’s not one he’s used before. She has no reason to be suspicious. 

Specs wonders if she’ll _remember_ one day. If any of them will. Or maybe it’ll be just him, maybe he _is_ actually crazy. The only way to know for sure is to wait. 

Things go back to normal after that. Mostly…

He almost calls Joey ‘Jojo’, and Tom ‘Tommy’ at ballet. Sure that’s how he thinks of them, but he can’t just change their nicknames. Blink is Blink, he mostly just grunts in acknowledgement whenever someone talks to him, and Specs usually doesn’t talk to him. 

He also wants to call Sophia ‘Smalls’, and he’s even caught himself almost using male pronouns for her. For some reason, he’s not having the same problem for Buttons. Maybe it’s because she dresses more femininely, or maybe it’s because he can call her ‘Buttons’ without it being weird. He’s not sure. He wonders if either of them had been trans in the _past,_ or if either of them were trans _now._ Obviously there’s no good way to ask, but if either of them ever told Specs that they were really a boy, Specs would respect that; or if they got their memories and told Specs that they had been girls in the _past,_ he would respect that too. The same goes for any of his friends, obviously. 

It’s nearly three months after he regains his memories that Buttons calls him at three a.m. 

_“Specs!”_ She gasps quietly into the phone. It sounds like she’s crying, but what really catches Specs’ attention is the nickname. No one’s ever called him that in _this_ lifetime except himself. 

“Buttons?” He asks. 

_“You remember, don’t you?”_ She sounds so lost. Specs wonders if he had seemed this lost when he had _remembered._

“I do,” he says simply. “Do you?”

_“Yeah,”_ she whispers quietly into the phone. 

“Do you want me to come over?” He offers, his moms aren’t home this weekend, they’re on a joint business trip to D.C. and won’t be back until Tuesday, no one will know if he sneaks out. 

_“No. No, if we talk here we’ll just wake my family.”_ Buttons declines._ “But… I can- can I come over there?”_

“Of course you can!” Specs agrees quickly. He’ll always be here for his friends. 

_“Thanks Specs.”_ Specs hears movement on the other end, which he guesses is Buttons preparing to leave. _“I’ll be there in thirty minutes tops.”_

“See you then,” Specs says before hanging up. He uses his time to go to the kitchen and make hot chocolate, Buttons will need it when she gets here. 

Twenty minutes later, Buttons is knocking on Specs’ door. She’s still in pjs, and she looks like she ran here, but Specs welcomes her in quickly. As soon as the door closes behind her, Buttons pulls Specs in for a hug, which he returns immediately. 

“They’re _different, _Specs,” Buttons sobs into his shoulder. 

“Who’s different?” Specs asks, adjusting his grip on Buttons so that he can lead her towards the sofa. 

“My family! They’re- they’re- they’re-“ Buttons cuts off with a sob. 

“I know.” Specs rubs soothing circles on Buttons’ back. “I know.”

They sit there for another hour. Buttons being overwhelmed by the _memories,_ and Specs doing his best to provide comfort. 

“Are we crazy, Specs?” Buttons asks once the sobbing dies down. 

“Only if we’re the same crazy,” Specs jokes, trying to lighten the mood. Buttons lets out a wet chuckle so Specs will count it as a win. 

“When you had that migraine…?” Buttons’ question trails off, but Specs knows what she’d wanted to ask. 

“I was watching Smalls and Romeo have a spoon fight, and I was suddenly _remembering_ a different spoon fight.”

“Oh my god! _Smalls!”_ Buttons gasp. “I forgot we called her Smalls. She’d kill us if we tried that _now!”_

“Well, she _was_ a boy back then. That might be part of why she let us call her that.” Specs suggests. 

“Nah,” Buttons counters. “She let us call her that because everyone had nicknames back then.” 

“True,” Specs concedes. 

“Does anyone else _remember?”_ Buttons asks. 

“Not that I know of,” Specs answers. “But it’s not exactly something you talk about. How did you know I knew?”

“You’ve been acting funny,” Buttons answers. 

Specs startles, he had been trying so hard- 

“Not like that,” Buttons cuts off his panic quickly. “It wasn’t noticeable until I knew what to look for. You’ve been calling Katherine ‘Kath’ recently, you used to call her ‘Katherine’ or ‘Katie’. Sometimes you would glance around, like you were looking for someone who should be there, but you couldn’t find them.”

“I keep looking for Jack, or Davey, or Les, Race, Crutchie, Mush,” Specs shrugs, there’s so many people who _should_ be here, but aren’t. 

“Yeah, I’ll bet.” Buttons has a sad smile on her face, and a far off look in her eyes. “Before I called you, I scrolled through all my contacts, looking for Jojo, and then I remembered that I don’t _know_ Jojo… it was hard.”

“I’ll bet,” Specs answers gently. “What triggered you to _remember _do you think?”

“I was studying with Henry earlier,” Buttons explains. “We were paired up in English, and he was over to study, and he told me that he was really a boy and I just…”

“You _remembered.”_

“I could see him as he was _before,” _Buttons said with a wistful smile on her face. “With that horrible plaid on plaid on plaid, and a newsie cap; and suddenly, it felt like my head exploded.”

“Yeah, I know the feeling.” Specs smiles ruefully. 

“I called you as soon as I could see straight.” Buttons lets out a small, cynical laugh. “I’ll bet Henry hates me now.”

“I’m sure he’ll understand-“

“He won’t if he doesn’t _remember!”_ Buttons throws her arms up in frustration. “He probably thinks I’m some transphobic psycho!”

“I doubt transphobic psychos get migraines just from being told that someone’s transgender.” Specs jokes, trying to lighten the mood again. 

“It’s not _funny, _Specs!” Buttons snaps, she’s frustrated, but Specs likes hearing people call him his name. 

“Call me ‘Specs’ again,” he requests. It clearly throws Buttons for a loop, but she complied anyway. 

“Specs?” Specs smiles. “Guess no one calls you that anymore, huh?”

“No,” Specs shakes his head. “No one calls me that.”

“Well, Specs,” Buttons declares seriously. “If you don’t mind, I shall continue to call you ‘Specs’ whenever I can from now on!”

“Thanks, Buttons, but you probably shouldn’t call me ‘Specs’ in front of the others. They’ll be confused.”

“Yeah,” Buttons sighs. “I’m really tired, can I sleep here Specs?”

“Sure, Buttons,” Specs smiles, it’s nearly six a.m. now, and while he had slept a whole five hours before Buttons had called him, he doubts she’s slept at all since Thursday night. He gets up from the sofa and heads towards the kitchen, he turns back briefly to ask “do you want anything to eat first?” But Buttons is already asleep. 

Specs smiles and grabs the throw blanket off the back of the sofa, draping it over his sleeping friend before heading to his own bed. It had sucked to get his _memories_ back without anyone to turn to, but he’s glad he’s here to help Buttons, and he hopes that if - when - the rest of his friends _remember,_ he’ll be there to help them too. 

He and Buttons hangout a lot more after that. Not that they weren’t close before, but now, with their newfound _memories,_ they’re practically inseparable. He learns that she’s a girl _now_ but in the _past_ she’d been a boy. 

“Does it seem weird to you?” Specs had asked. “To be different.”

Buttons had just shrugged and replied “not really. I mean I’m me, right? I was Me _then,_ and I’m Me _now. _Just, a modern version of me.”

He tells her about his months of wondering if he was crazy. She tells him how she’ll look for one of her younger siblings, only to realize that they don’t exist. She also tells him about her crush on both Jojo and Henry. 

“Is it weird to still like them?” She had asked. “I mean I don’t even _know_ Jojo, but I miss him, and Henry seems so… _familiar._ Ya know?”

And Specs does know. They all seem _familiar,_ they don’t _remember_ themselves from _before,_ but like Buttons had said, they’re still them, just modern versions. And as for the crush, he thinks of Romeo, and he understands. Just because that was _then, _and this is _now, _doesn’t mean they aren’t them same people Specs and Buttons had been crushing on in the _past. _

“I know,” he had answered. 

He and Buttons practically spend every waking hour together, and the others are starting to notice. 

“You know you’re my best friend, right Spence?” Romeo asks one day when it’s just the two of them hanging out at Romeo and Smalls’ place. Smalls is at karate, Katherine has to spend some “quality time” with her family, and Buttons is babysitting. 

“Of course I know, Ro,” Specs says carefully, putting his DS down. “You’re my best friend too.”

“Right, I mean, yeah but…” Romeo hesitates. Specs waits patiently as Romeo puzzles out his next words. “You know you can tell me anything… right?”

“Of course,” Specs answers slowly, still unsure as to where this is going. Romeo stares at Specs as if he’s trying to convey some sort of message, but Specs doesn’t know what it is. 

Romeo sighs and finally says “I know you and Buttons are dating.”

“What?” Specs had _not _seen that coming. “I’m not- I mean _we’re_ not- _no.”_

“Dude, you guys have been hanging out together all. The. Time. Did you really think we weren’t going to catch on?” Romeo looks… betrayed is the word Specs would use. 

_‘Of course he’s betrayed!’ _Specs chides himself. _‘You’ve been ditching him for Buttons for weeks.’_

“No, Ro, it’s not like that!!”

“It’s fine, Spence, really, I get it. Buttons is cute, you’re hot, it only makes sense that you’d end up together. Honestly I thought you were going to end up with Katherine but-“

Specs panics. He’s not usually one for cutting people off, especially by kissing them, but it’s the fastest way he can think of to convince Romeo that he’s not dating Buttons. 

That and he _does_ want to kiss Romeo, he’s _always_ wanted to kiss Romeo, but in the _past_ it had been too dangerous. He knows that others had been together in the _past,_ like Blink and Mush, Race and Albert, Sniper and Smalls, but he also knows that Race had been dead in an alley a little over a year after Jack had quit being a newsie. He knows that Albert had skipped town, that Mush had gotten a wife, at Sniper had committed suicide after Smalls had been hanged… he knows that _then_ hadn’t been a good time for these feelings. He also knows that _now_ is a much better time. 

And he knows that Romeo is kissing back. 

“Mmm, Specs,” Romeo whispers as they pull apart. “Specs?”

Romeo suddenly pitches forward, clutching at his head. Specs knows what’s happening. Of course he does, Romeo had called him ‘Specs’ for crying out loud. 

“It’s okay, Ro,” Specs gently guides Romeo down until he’s lying on the bed with Specs sitting over him, petting his hair. “You’re okay.”

“What’s- why’re- _hurts!” _Romeo whines, and Specs knows. He knows. 

“It’s alright, Ro, you’re just _remembering.”_ Specs whispers comfortingly, adjusting Romeo’s blanket to block as much light as possible without suffocating him. “It’ll pass soon, just let the _memories_ roll, don’t fight it.”

“What am I remembering, Specs?” Romeo sounds so pained and scared, Specs feels for him, he really does, but there’s nothing he can do for Romeo now except for being here. 

“The _past.”_ He answers simply. Romeo whimpers and curls closer to Specs, but he doesn’t speak otherwise. 

Specs isn’t sure how long he sits there holding Romeo, occasionally whispering comforting words. At some point Medda had come in to check on them, at seeing Romeo’s distress, she had gotten some water and a bottle of aspirin. After failing to get Romeo to take the aspirin, Medda had made sure Specs was fine to stay with him until the migraine passed, then she’d turned the overhead light off and left the room. Specs has been sitting in the soft glow of Romeo’s nightlight ever since. 

At some point, Romeo’s whimpers quiet down, and eventually Specs is pretty sure he’s just sleeping. It’s dark outside, and Specs is too tired to walk home, and he doubts Medda’s awake to drive him, so he just worms his way into lying down Romeo’s bed. Romeo immediately snuggles into Specs’ side, and Specs is stricken with memories of the _past. _It wasn’t uncommon to share a bed back then if it was cold out, or you couldn’t afford one. It’s been a while since Specs had shared a bed with anyone, it feels nice, _familiar._ Safe. 

In the morning, Medda shoos Specs off to school with Smalls, but let’s Romeo continue to sleep, and while Specs is grateful that she let Romeo miss school, he wishes he’d been there to help Romeo like he had with Buttons. But just because they’re in physically different places, doesn’t mean Romeo can’t text him. And he does. All day. Nonstop. Specs texts back as often as he can, but he’s got classes, he can’t just be on his phone all the time. 

**Romeo @ 9:41am: **  
_Is this real?_

**Romeo @ 9:42 am:**   
_So you remember too right?_

**Romeo @ 9:42 am: **  
_How long have you remembered?_

**Romeo @ 9:45 am:**   
_Does Buttons remember?_

**Romeo @ 9:45 am: **  
_Is that why you spend so much time with her?_

**Romeo @ 9:46 am: **  
_Does anyone else remember?_

**Romeo @ 9:46 am:**   
_Does Katherine remember?_

**Romeo @ 9:46 am:**   
_Does Smalls?_

**Romeo @ 9:51 am:**   
_Do you have trouble remembering to call Smalls Sophia?_

**Romeo @ 9:52 am: **  
_Is it weird that Buttons and Smalls are girls now?_

**Romeo @ 9:59 am:**   
_Do you like being called Specs or Spencer better?_

**Romeo @ 10:03 am: **  
_Do you know anyone else who remembers?_

**Romeo @ 10:08 am:**   
_Do you like me?_

**Romeo @ 10:08 am:**   
_You kissed me so I assume you like me_

**Romeo @ 10:15 am: **  
_Do you think everyone has a past life that they remember?_

**Romeo @ 10:17 am:**   
_Did we remember past lives before?_

**Romeo @ 10:21 am: **  
_Are we reincarnated?_

**Specs @ 10:36 am: **  
_As far as I can tell this is real_  
_I’ve remembered since that day last semester where I went home with a migraine_  
_I like being called Specs_  
_Buttons does remember but I don’t think anyone else does_  
_It’s hard to remember to call Smalls Sophia sometimes_  
_Buttons does think it’s weird that she’s a girl now so I don’t either_  
_I don’t think everyone remembers past lives_  
_I think we are reincarnated_  
_And yes, I like you_  
_Always did _

**Romeo @ 10:36 am: **  
💖💖💖

**Specs @ 10:37 am:**   
_I have class now so I have to go_

**Romeo @ 10:38 am: **  
😘

Specs and Buttons go to Romeo’s house after school. Smalls has tennis practice, and Katherine has yearbook club, so it’s just them and Romeo. Just the people who _remember. _

“It’s so weird,” Romeo says. He’s sitting on his bed, leaning fully into Specs who’s sitting next to him, Buttons is sitting at his desk, playing with a rubix cube. “We had whole other lives. I feel… _different_ now.”

“I feel you,” Buttons sympathizes. “It’s like, I remember being an adult, but I also know that I’m _not.”_

“Yeah and like, I keep looking at Medda and thinking ‘she must _know, _right?’ But I can't be sure.”

“That must be hard,” Specs says, thinking of his own moms. He had been an orphan in the _past_ but he thinks that his maman (his bio mom) is the same person who gave birth to him _before,_ but he’d been young when his mom had died, so he can’t be sure; and that’s _nothing_ compared to having an adopted mom who is _definitely_ someone they knew in the _past. _

“I asked her if Jack was here earlier,” Romeo confesses, down at his hands. “She said he wasn’t here yet, but I should be patient.”

“Really?” Buttons asks excitedly. If Medda had actually said that then that would mean she _remembers_ too. 

“I think so, but I was half asleep at the time. It might not have actually happened, or she might have been humoring me, I can’t tell.”

“Should we ask her?” Buttons looks to Specs for an answer, he’s not sure if it’s because he’s the oldest, or if it’s because he had _remembered_ first, but apparently he’s the unofficial leader of their _memory_ circle. 

Specs thinks on it for a moment before shaking his head. “If it’s important then she’ll tell us.”

“And what about the others?” Romeo asks. “Should we tell them?”

“No,” Specs decides. “If they’re going to remember, then we should let them _remember_ naturally.”

“What if they never _remember?”_ Buttons asks quietly, afraid of the answer. 

“Then they don’t _remember,”_ Specs answers, even though he doesn’t like the answer himself. “We _remembered_ all by ourselves, they can too.”

Buttons nods sadly. Romeo grabs Specs’s hand and squeezes it, Specs gives him a squeeze back before continuing. 

“But until then, we have each other, and that’s better than nothing.”

Romeo nods, and Buttons gives him a smile. 

Yeah, Specs was the first to _remember,_ but he’s far from the last. The rest will come around eventually... probably

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so happy that I finally finished this! This is the first in my series of reincarnation fics. Current future fics are:
> 
> Katherine POV: Katherine knows her friends are acting strange, but she can’t quite pinpoint how; but when the Jacobs family moves into town, she can’t help but be struck by the tall gangly boy with dark curly hair and kind, caring eyes. 
> 
> Blink POV: Louis is a man of habit. He goes to school every day, twice a week after school he has fencing lessons, once a week he’s got chess club after school, and the other two days he goes straight home to work on his homework. Structure is good, structure is safe. But one day he breaks his habits and goes for a walk in the park instead of straight home, he meets someone there. Someone he never even knew he’d forgotten. 
> 
> Smalls POV: Medda takes in three more kids, what’s wrong with Sophia and Romeo? Why does Medda need more kids, and why do they say they’re siblings when they look nothing alike? Nothing makes sense to her until the youngest of the three gets hit by a car and loses his leg. 
> 
> Jack POV: Jack’s had these memories for years, ever since his mom left him. He’s never said anything, just thinks that they’re just his imagination… until he meets a familiar face in a foster home one day, then he starts to have doubts that he’d just made it up. 
> 
> Race POV: sometimes it feels like everyone around him knows something that he doesn’t. He thinks Jack and Charlie got really close to their foster siblings and their friends really fast, not that Race doesn’t like them, he does, he just took his time getting there is all. Jack and Charlie hadn’t. And it’s been years now, he’s about to graduate from college for crying out loud, and Jack’s getting married. To two people. Sure it’s not technically legal, but Race is a supportive brother, and he can tell that Jack loves Katherine and Davey a lot, and they love him too. But he can’t shake the feeling that everyone knows something that he doesn’t. Like there’s an inside joke he’s being left out of on purpose. It doesn’t make sense, until one day Race is flipping through Jack’s sketchbook. Jack got so many sketches of his friends, but there are some people that he doesn’t recognize, until he comes across a sketch of a boy with mischief in his eyes and a newsboy cap on backwards. Race knows that face. 
> 
> Morris POV: Morris is happy with his life. He’s going to a college far from his abusive uncle and his tattletale of a brother, he lives with his beautiful boyfriend, he’s got the dog he’s always wanted. Life is good. Until one day his brother shows up on his doorstep, beaten to hell. Suddenly Morris is remembering things he wishes he wasn’t. He has to help his brother, but what’s his boyfriend going to think?
> 
> Albert POV: four years ago today, Albert hit rock bottom, as a consequence, he spent almost a year in hell before his angel came to save him. Now, after three years of therapy, he can honestly say he’s happy. He lives in Santa Fe New Mexico with his angel and his service dog Lulu, he’s got a job teaching ballet to low income children at the community center (it doesn’t pay much, but his angel says as long as it’s making him happy, he should do it, angel will cover his half of rent), and he’s got time to just sit outside and feel the sun that he had so dearly missed warm is skin. Yeah he’s happy, but every now and then his mind will drift to energetic blue eyes, and golden curls, and he’ll wonder ‘could I be happier?’
> 
> But these are just my current ideas, what I plan on going in, and what I end up with are usually two different things... so we'll see how this goes  
Also of note is that I think this will be the oder I put them in, but it probably won't be the order I write them in.


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